she goes down like the titanic
by mirajens
Summary: I wanna see your animal side; I need your broken promises —Miraxus


**note:** AU in which Lisanna never died and Mira and Laxus are sortakinda friends ja feel?

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**she goes down like the titanic**

by _slowrabbits_

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It was the morning that followed the eve of his twenty-first birthday that Laxus woke up with the mother of all hangovers and nothing but a scratchy Afghan to preserve his modesty and protect him from the chill that seeped from the open window. He was in unfamiliar surroundings, he observed upon the clearing of his vision. There was clothing strewn everywhere in the cheap motel he somehow ended up in, and the whole damn place smelled of weed and peanuts and gross body fluids. There was an open box of pizza, half done and already hosting a cockroach party. The door to the yellowing bathroom was open. The heater was broken.

He was naked.

Jesus, who did he sleep with? He was almost afraid to check who that warm body was behind him. It could have been Lisanna. Or Lucy. God help him. He wanted to keep his balls from Salamander's powerful flame, thanks, or Elfman's freakishly huge claws.

He made to move (read: crawl) out of the springy bed when a pale hand reached out to grab his.

"Stay a while, Laxus." Came a voice oozing sex and smugness. He knew that voice anywhere, he thought as all the blood drained from his head.  
Shit. Oh shit, oh shit, oh _shit_. Maybe Elfman _was_ gonna get to shred Laxus' balls like bok choy.

Mirajane Strauss was the last person he expected to wake up next to. Sure, there was sexual tension between them palpable enough to hack through with a bolo, but she was haughty and sarcastic under her more demure demeanor and Laxus was pretty sure he couldn't stand the pretense that was her. He'd always thought her to be too troublesome and too young and too stupid to bother nabbing in the sack. This was the girl who had demonic temper tantrums when Natsu took Lisanna out past her curfew and once (supposedly) destroyed an entire village for making the formerly sensitive Elfman cry on a mission.

Yet he was friends (and he used that term with her very loosely) with her enough that she and his grandfather schemed about the birthday party they would throw Laxus some weeks ago.

Speaking of his birthday party: what a wild fucking night. Fairy Tail always found an excuse to dole out alcohol as if it was going out of fashion the next morning and to be the loud sons of bitches they were. Laxus was a quiet man, compared to most of his guild mates, but he found that he had fun in the rowdy festivities. Watching a drunk Erza dirty dance with Nab to Maddonna was a spiritual experience. Even more surreal was getting a lap dance from Cana. And then there was walking in on Gray getting a blow in the men's bathroom. But then again, he also had sex with Mirajane Strauss.

A seventeen year old Mirajane Strauss.

He dropped his throbbing head onto his hands. "My grandfather's gonna kill me after he bails me out of jail for sleeping with jailbait."

The gravity of the situation was lost on the Take Over Demon. "You are very cute when you're troubled." The slinky little wench slowly pressed her naked front to his back. Fuck, he could feel her nipples against his shoulderblades. "And did I mention you're all kinds of sexy when you're guilty?"

Familiar stirrings began in his loins. "Jesus fuck, Mira, are you trying to seduce me again?"

"Maybe," she purred, rubbing her body deliciously against his. "Is it working?"

"No." _Yes_. "Just fuck off and let me think."

Mirajane licked her lips. Yeah, he was definitely cute like this. "No one needs to know about this, Laxus."

He spared her a withering glare. Which was a big fucking mistake, as it turns out, because holy goddamn, she looked fine as hell wearing nothing but an itty bitty thong and that Satanic smile of hers. Self control only got him so far, so there he was all over Mirajane again, just like last night, lips and tongue roving over her body as if she was a goddess and he was a mere mortal sent to worship her.

She pulled his face up back to hers, grabbing him by the hair (which was fucking hot, by the way) and grinned stupidly at him. "No one needs to know, okay? This isn't Gossip Girl. You keep your mouth shut and I'll do the same."  
Laxus nodded. Mirajane proceeded to do just the opposite of keeping her mouth shut as she went down on last night's birthday boy.

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**AN**: I don't understand this so its fine if you don't, too. This was just me still basking in the Miraxus cover photo so yeah don't h8

Dinosaurs didn't review and now they're extinct. Coincidence? I think not.

_**Please don't add this to you Favorites/Alerts if you're not going to review.**_


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